A portrait of the poet at large/man about town as a young man.

I was on a visit to cousin Violet's home in Stormhold for tea and snapped this while waiting for tea to be prepared. I was going for "slightly byronesque and rumpled, but incredibly handsome poet and man about town" and think I was rather successful in this endevour!

Greetings gentle readers. I Phineas Matova, Man about Town and Poet at Large..have returned!!!

Returned from what, you may ask...and of course I will answer, you silly gooses. *beams*

This is the time of year when I am... press ganged into accompanying my aunts, uncles and assorted others on a grand tour of the Mediterranean. Meaning, Phineas Matova, usually the dapper gent given to merriments of alll sorts, is required to spend a great deal of time with his...tiresome family.

Long, dreary meals, listening to various uncles and aunt blather about the consistency of their broth and whether noodles are the 'devils work' , whilst I stare miserably into my supper.

Even drearier apres dinner gatherings where one's niece or nephew mercilessly tortures a musical instrument or performs an ennui-inducing pantomime, usually followed by a discussion of the various and sundry maladies that have struck those more advanced in age of the family.

My only relief was the embrace of sweet, merciful sleep and the rare escape with Uncle Jeremiah to nearby drinking establishments.

But thankfully, my familial nightmare is over.... at least until next spring.

Cupid for hire!

As Valentines day is fast approaching, I Phineas Matova, Man About Town and Poet at Large, would like to offer my services to the ladies of Caledon, New Babbage, Steelhead and other nations in the Realm of the Roses as a Cupid for Hire. For the price of twenty-five linden (you pay me, don't be funny now) I shall arrive (in the charming costume above) and give you a kiss. A kiss that shall no doubt make you quite ...weak in the knees...*smiles*

And remember ladies... please no...arguments or scuffles over me...I know I am incredibly charming and handsome, but there is quite enough of me to go around *wink*

Portrait of an Auntie in Purple

Somewhat self explanatory....

Fiendish Tropical Islands!!

Feeling a bit of the winter...malaise and dreadfully in need of a tropical holiday, I thought that Mondserrat would set me right. The trip began...oddly..as I scrambled out of an escape hatch...

And deposited myself on a beach that seemed to be free of dancing girls and refreshing beverages featuring rum, but was full of shipwreck debris and these fellows.

More 'modern' art I suppose *hic* palm trees, big flowery things.....now this looks more like it. Oooh a kitty. Nice kitty!!!

Me and the nice kitty!

I stumbled upon what appeared to be a teddy bear picnic. The teddies proved to be more irascible than Aunt Juniper even. And armed with Napalm.

After fleeing the cute little homicidal maniacs and checking to see that I was not still on fire, I paused by this curious sign. How silly, what Meteorites???

Oh...that meteorite. Right...

After trudging up more bloody hills, getting stung by bees, I stumbled across a temple of the "Happicat". Thankfully, the temple appears to provide free food, as I had been wandering for hours and had yet to find a pub on this blasted island.

After stumbling around for a few more hours, I chanced upon this wondrous sight!! I shall admit to weeping with joy...

Awakening groggily the next morning under the bar....I continued my journey...filled with a strange dread...or perhaps that was just the cheeseburger...

Ooh! What a shiny and colorful vehicle!! Unfortunately it was filled with shouty and bad tempered aliens...

Giant volcanic kitty!!

Feeling rather rough after several hours of dodging things, running away from things and falling down hills.... and rather in need of a....vacation ...from the tropical island....I managed to flag down a passing fishing vessel, who were kind enough to deposit me at the nearest hospital in Port Caledon.

Happy New Year!!

I hope this finds everyone well..

As the old year departs and the new year creeps in, I find myself reflecting upon the past. Yes, even I, Phineas Matova, Man About Town, Poet at Large and general bon vivant, will stop and reflect upon the past.

Of course, when one has been locked in one's room by one short, irascible, table-tipping auntie, one is rather forced to find a way to occupy one's time. That was the major unfortunate development this year....finding myself under the eagle eye and in the withered talons of one Auntie Juniper. *shudders*

Beyond that disturbing development, it wasn't a bad year. I managed to avoid spending time in either gaol or the sanitorium.

I came close this summer . after being accused of burning my cousins house down (it was the unicorn!!) and only managed to escape by becoming a fugitive in Tanglewood. The life of an outlaw, filled as it was with tinies with pointed sticks and poison ivy, was still preferable to the drudgery that was to await me when Auntie Juniper swooped in and carted me off to her boarding house that smells of boiled cabbage and wet wool.

My hope for this year, as years past is to locate a young lady with a castle who can support - I mean become my lovely blushing bride.

Joyeux Noel!!

Wishing everyone a smashing Christmas. (hic) Auntie dragged me off to cousin Violet's for Christmas dinner this year. To Stormhold...which was awfully snowy and chilly. Better than the boarding house, I suppose. Oh yes, I'm back there, to my great chagrin (hic) There was...an incident...something to do with my flat burning down or something....something like that...

Here is a tintype Auntie took of cousin Violet and myself whilst we were waiting for the goose to cook:

(My cousin promptly mocked my hat. She is simply jealous because she is not nearly as smashing as I am)